A longing heart

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puddleduck_21
Posts: 18
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2007 5:05 pm
Location: Leeds

A longing heart

Post by puddleduck_21 »

I'm long past my times of NEEDING FA. Yet I'm a person who feels lost without it. I don't want it any more. I wish I was normal, yet as normal as I am now I don't love myself like I used to. I was the girlfriend of a heroin addict for 13 years (8 using, 4 clean with the help of NA). My Ex left me 3 and a half years ago on new years eve. I was heart broken. We had a 4 year old daughter, a home and a good life and I couldn't understand it, I still don't. I accept it now because I'm happy, I'm married to another man. My daughter is happy. My ex is happy. I have a good job and so does my husband. We earn well. But I still long for the peace and serenity I used to have when I went to an FA meeting every week! I've sacrificed too much for my current relationship. My current life. It's all happiness and magic but it lacks God and peace. Things I once had. Things I've known and lost. I need them back!
LM66
Posts: 2321
Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2014 6:04 am

Re: A longing heart

Post by LM66 »

Hi Puddleduck,

Is there any other social groups you could join, that will fill that gap for you?
You're right, we can all give too much of ourselves - infact, we can lose ourselves, if we don't hold on to "things" that are "just for us".
I'm glad you don't need FA anymore, but I hope you can find something just for you, that gives you what you need.

Much Love
L x
"You can choose to continually live in the shadow of your addict, allowing his/her chaos and drama to dictate your whole existence, or you can take control of your life."
Thankful
Posts: 137
Joined: Sun Feb 06, 2011 4:57 pm
Location: Hertfordshire

Re: A longing heart

Post by Thankful »

Hi Puddleduck

It's odd isn't it, when the "problem" has seemingly gone away, but it doesn't bring all the relief expected?

My addicted loved one has recently started to recover, and of course it s a great relief and joy to see his progress. But it also reveals how much I need to recover. Having taken the "problem" away, I now am starting to understand how much of it I was a part of!

So - keep coming back, it works if you work it!

If you can't get to an FA meeting, please send me a private message and I can suggest some alternatives if you're interested.

Thankful
WLITF

Thankful

"Let Go and Let God"
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